Welcome to
Charley’s ROOM
Well, at the moment Charley is up on the 7th floor (a place you’re probably not allowed to go to yet), briefing Management on the recent drama that’s going on around here at The Red Rainbow, involving a botched Quantum Virtual Reality experiment Sal conducted with a few of the other members without Managements permission. Charley was HQ on the mission, as she is well versed in the history of the multiverse. You see, Sal was on an investigative journey into a dimension we call the Second Heaven, but a technical glitch caused him to get stuck there for 300 years (virtual time), and Charley feels she is responsible, and therefore feels terrible about the whole ordeal. Sal is in recovery, but is convinced the trip was well worth it. You see, they went there to find out whether or not planet Earth is doomed or… Oh what am I doing. I’m not supposed to be telling you any of this. So, I guess just delete all that previous information from your brain.
Actually… you’re a human. You don’t ‘delete’ things from your brain do you?. You… oh what’s the word. That’s right, you forget it. Pretend you walked in here and I just said, This is Charley’s Room where she sleeps, brushes her teeth, orders room service from Jerry’s Larry, sometimes poops, and most frequently studies cosmic history and writes her upcoming book on Extraterrestrials titled: Why the Long Face?
That is all. Goodbye.
*after common era
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Once upon a time when she was in her early 20's, Charley left the glorious green paradise of Southern Ireland—for some stupid reason—to take a sabbatical in Queenstown, New Zealand. Her intention was to snowboard, bungy jump, and otherwise party her miserable guts out. One weekend she decided to drive down to Invercargill to stare at Henry the 117 year old lizard, the oldest in the world mind you. On that trip she visited Stewart Island as well. Then Charley had a revelation. “Antarctica is right fecking there," she thought to herself. And from that point on she began to investigate Antarctica on the internet. This lead to an obsession with underground bases, ancient ruins, cultures, and extra-terrestrials that would permeate her thoughts and imagination from that point on. She now works for us as a Cosmic-Historian, is surprisingly pretentious, and can often be found at the bar telling Tallon about all the ways his music could be better
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