Apocalypse, Not Now.

Four Horses
Named Conquest, War, Famine, and Death
(someone give them back their horns)

For the last thousand years--give or take a millennia--a large portion of humanity has been focusing on something they thought was unavoidable. In fact, one third of Earth's population has been reading about it constantly their entire lives. It's been predicted many, many, many, many, many, many, many, times with absolutely no accuracy. It's been used as a means for tricking gullible morons into taking radical action. Its been a source of material gain for cult leaders. It's been written about, feared, and generally reconfigured for entertainment purposes countless times. And even we have to admit that we are here to do that exact thing just one more time. The thing we are referring to is called The Apocalypse. Ever heard of it? If you haven’t, then congratulations on your miraculous ability to be the size of a human yet still live under a rock, and please feel free to never visit this blog ever again. If you are one of the many aforementioned people obsessed with it, we suggest that you stop focussing on it immediately. Why? Because what you have failed to realize, is that IF it occurs, it could be your fault. 

"But...But...But it’s the end of the world. How could that be my fault?" you might annoyingly ask. And as much as we all wish there was a simple answer to that question, there isn’t. But, rest assured, you will inevitably come to the conclusion that it’s true.

So, without further adieu, Potential Future #1: The Apocolypse

The word Apocalypse, as it is used in the english language, is derived from the Greek apokálupsis. Which is a combination of two other words apó, and kalúpto. The first being a prefix that basically means un- and the second meaning to cover or conceal. So when you take both pills at the same time it means to uncover or reveal. 

As you can hopefully deduce, this is where the association with the Four Horses, and thereby The Book of Revelations becomes relevant. Even if you’ve never read it, you’ve probably heard of it. Basically, our buddy going by the name of John the Apostle wrote a letter to a bunch of people saying that he had a super trippy dream and/or psychedelic hallucination brought on by Morning Glory seeds (archaeological evidence pending, see the Reil Island for details) that apparently was super negative and intense. The intended audience was supposed to read it and turn from their evil ways immediately, or else. (see Chpt. 2) If you’re a fundamentalist that doesn’t believe that the writing of the book had anything to do with drugs, to you I submit Revelations 10:10 for your review. Keep in mind that nausea is an extremely common side effect of ingesting such mind benders. Moving on.... The most important thing to remember is that this letter was written by ONE person, with extremely strong beliefs in ONE major--and at the time new--religion. The only reason we are even zeroing in on this particular case, is that it is the domino that set the entire west coast obsession with the end of the world in motion. Lots of other cultures took it to heart too of course, but we’re the ones that still make EVERY F--KING MOVIE about it. If you can’t connected the dots of that yourself, I’ll just say this: American superheroes are a clever bait and switch for people who don't believe in the written version. 

Here’s a comparison that should ring some bells:

Parents:

Johnathan and Martha vs. Joseph and Mary

Relation:

Not their real son vs. Not technically their son

Social Status:

Lower class farmers vs. Lower class carpenters 

Childhood:

Raised in a barn in Smallville vs. Born in a barn in Bethlehem

Real Dad:

Jor-El vs. God

(El means diety)

Mild Mannered Alter Ego: 

Clark vs. Yeshua

Public Title:

Superman vs. Jesus Christ

(also a good movie title)

Special Abilities:

All the best superpowers vs. well... all the best superpowers

Best friend turned Arch-Nemesis:

Lex Luthor vs The Lightbringer Lucifer

I could go on and on. Bottom line is, it’s a pyramid scheme designed to profit off of symbolic ignorance while causing the audience to find hope in something they supposedly don’t believe in. Changing the names changes The Game. Still not convinced?

Clark grows up and soon becomes aware of his powers and otherworldly origin. He then goes out to help make the world a better place using those powers under the pseudonym Superman. But with this comes greater threats and greater responsibilities the likes of which humanity had never before faced. The public eventually turns on him due to collateral damage and the disruption in society. A plot is set in motion. Doomsday *wink-wink* beats Superman to death, and shortly thereafter he is resurrected from the dead in order to save the world. Coincidentally, Lex Luthor shows up again at the same time. Our current calendar revolves around a different version of that fictional event whether you like it or not. Plus or minus 3 years, just ask the Freemasons.

"Gee, case and point," you should say. 

Why did I just lead you down that tangential and sarcastic rabbit hole? Because it illustrates the fact that we’ve been telling the same damn story a million different ways and it’s time to stop. The term Apocalypse has so much more potential. Enough with the re-runs. By now we know what the literal destruction of the world would look like. We also know an original ideas can come from dreams. They are sometimes REVEALED through REVELATIONS as they say. If John--the writer of the famous dream journal in question--is the only person who experienced that particular version of the revelation, we subsequently must accept that he is the only one who initially claimed it to be universally true. Perhaps you should start writing down your own dreams. You never know when you’ll stumble upon the new and improved, much more colorful apocalypse. I’ll give you three hints: It begins. There's an illusion. Then it ends...